CHRIS

“I came for impressionism, not tits.”

“That sandwich is about as sexy as a turd in a dress.”

“You want more milk? I’m covered in milk! All you have to do now is set fire to my clothes.”

"Why should legumes be deprived of foreskin?"

"I’m just an erection with a body to carry it around."

"An ill-placed Whee! could really do some harm."

"Nothing excites me quite like pork does."

"I had no idea there was penetration in Penthouse"

"I love zucchini from a philosophical standpoint."

RICHARD

“I love computer-generated sweat.”

“I think all girls have the subconscious desire to spontaneously yodel.”

“Our sauces have conmingled.”

“I’ve built a career out of gesticulations.”